March - Part 2

Shock, I'm writing this on another plane. My carbon footprint is not the best right now. This flight is to Atlanta for work, so I can't really help it.

I've lucked out with a full row to myself as the guy on the isle seat moved to sit with his family. I've got 8 and a half hours in this plane. Snacks have already come round and we get lunch and an "afternoon tea" as well. It's not business class but I haven't paid a penny, I can't complain.

Bucharest was great, we spent a day in the spa and had some fun nights out as well. It was exactly what I needed and it made me realise that I have so much to look forward to with my friends this year. After the trip, I've spent most of my time with Steven, Ben and Janara. We've all been through it at the beginning of this year but I have a good feeling that this year will cut us all a break and we'll experience great things.

Shortly after my job offer and pay rise, I had an email from my landlady putting my rent up. The money I had in a pay increase was the exact amount my rent went up, so I'm not really benefiting from it. The house searching has now become slightly more desperate.

This month has been really busy which means it's gone quickly. I've been quite emotional though, I cry at random times and it comes and goes in waves. The breakup has rewired my brain in a way that I've not experienced before, I'm not as sad that it's over, I'm scared that I have to learn to trust someone again one day. I have to be so patient with myself and allow myself to feel. I've not isolated myself which I'm proud of and I think keeping sociable with good people will ensure I don't slip back into that bad habit.

The weekend after Bucharest we headed to London to celebrate Beth's 26th Birthday. We went to the rugby, it was an incredible game and such a turnaround with Quinns smashing the second half and beating Saracens who were ahead in the first half . It was my first rugby game, I've wanted to go for years so this was a bucket list experience.

The gym also had a social recently but it was a bit awkward as we don't tend to see the regulars in the gym outside of the gym, however I went with one of the guys I've been training with recently, James, and Ed and Imogen turned up too. It's been great getting to build a bit more of a community at the gym. Working from home means I don't get to see a lot of people so the gym has been a good outlet for me to keep sane. I smashed a Squat PB one day this month at 63.5kg for two sets of 3 which is more than my body weight.

I've been able to build a strong level of trust my friends, and have spoken openly about everything I have been through in my adolescence and early 20's that still lingers. I've only ever told my romantic partners about it because I've felt the need to explain myself in case I get triggered. I've been reflecting a lot on this. I think it has given me a really positive point of action to be able to gain a good middle ground between being by myself and surrounding myself with the people that I trust when things get too much. I know I'm learning so much more about myself through everything I experience, I can't help but feel grateful.

The 100 day challenge is still going strong and we're on day 59 now. I'll have to go for a walk as soon as we've checked into the hotel in Atlanta because it'll be 8pm UK time and I haven't done anything for it today. There's a large park by the hotel so I'll head out to explore there.

I think that's about everything, the clocks went back yesterday, the days are getting lighter and sunnier and spring and summer are creeping in. Despite the odd crying session here and there, I feel really positive about the months ahead of me.